Product Description
Outrageous, raw, and painfully funny true stories straight from the life of the actor, comedian, and much-loved cast member of The Howard Stern Show—with a foreword by Howard Stern.
When Artie Lange joined the permanent cast of The Howard Stern Show in 2001, it was possibly the greatest thing ever to happen in the Stern universe, second only to the show’s move to the wild, uncensored frontier of satellite radio. Lange provided what Stern had yet to find all in the same place: a wit quick enough to keep pace with his own, a pathetic self-image to dwarf his own, a personal history both heartbreaking and hilarious, and an ingrained sense of self-sabotage that continually keeps things interesting.
A natural storyteller with a bottomless pit of material, Lange grew up in a close-knit, working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, a maniacal Yankees fan who pursued the two things his father said he was cut out for—sports and comedy. Tragically, Artie Lange Sr. never saw the truth in that prediction: He became a quadriplegic in an accident when Artie was eighteen and died soon after. But as with every trial in his life, from his drug addiction to his obesity to his fights with his mother, Artie mines the humor, pathos, and humanity in these events and turns them into comedy classics.
True fans of the Stern Show will find Artie gold in these pages: hilarious tales that couldn’t have happened to anyone else. There are stories from his days driving a Jersey cab, working as a longshoreman in Port Newark, and navigating the dark circuit of stand-up comedy. There are outrageous episodes from the frenzied heights of his coked-up days at MADtv, surprisingly moving stories from his childhood, and an account of his recent U.S.O. tour that is equally stirring and irreverent. But also in this volume are stories Artie’s never told before, including some that he deemed too revealing for radio.
Wild, shocking, and drop-dead hilarious, TOO FAT TO FISH is Artie Lange giving everything he’s got to give. And like a true pro, the man never disappoints.
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 Too Fat to Give a F*#&
As a devout Howard Stern fan, I might have a different perspective than someone who is not as familiar with the Howard Stern radio show. I like Artie. I think he's great on the Stern show and more than earns his keep. Okay here is the big butttttttt.....if you are a fan of the show there is very little this book contains that you haven't heard before like the bank robbery and the pig stories and a very clear omission of his relationship with Dana, who was his long term girlfriend and is/was the love of his life and about his life on the Stern show. Sadly, I found this book to be another "junkie" story but one with whose stories I have heard many times over. If you aren't familiar with Artie Lange, I think you will enjoy this book. For me, it was familiar ground.
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Heroin Let Down
I am too lazy to read any book. Audio books are my thing. As such, I rated this book 3 stars because of Artie not reading the entire book. He did read the first 6 chapters, then included his commentary as to why he hired/asked, Bababooey, Jim Florentine and the Reverend Bob Levy to read the rest.
At the end of the day, his heroin addiction affects so much of his life that he cannot read a book for 8 hours into a tape recorder. My expectations were dashed when Bababooey opened his big yapper in chapter 7.
The stories just are not the same when being told by familiar voices that are not Arties.
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Good but not great ( smtilley2 )
Just for starters, I am a huge fan of Artie and Howard. I've been a fan of Howard for many years and I have seen Artie live. But, to be honest, the book is just okay. The main problem I have is that I have already heard 95% of the stories in the book. There was some fresh stuff in there but not enough. I also wish he would have spent some time talking about the show, maybe background info or inside dishes. Oh well, still love you Artie, you baby gorilla.
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 WAAAAAAH! ( polywog27 )
I've been a fan of the Howard Stern show since 1990, and I listen to him daily on Sirius. I've had mixed feelings about Artie during his time on the show--sometimes I liked him, sometimes I hated him, mostly I just felt he was a little too self-important and condescending.
I wasn't going to read Too Fat to Fish, but I figured maybe there was a story or two that I hadn't heard on the Stern Show. There was one (taxi driver story) which was pretty funny, but the rest I had heard before. And I wasn't impressed.
Overall, Artie comes off looking like a big fat baby who throughout his life never took care of himself. It isn't cute... or interesting.
The most annoying parts of the book were the "shout-outs" to old agents, Christina Applegate, Orlando Jones, etc. Who cares.
The very last few pages of the book were an opportunity for Artie to wrap the book up in a comedic way. Instead, he tries to be "serious" with his inspirational message about the war and the troops. By that point of the book I was so bored with it I wasn't even going to finish it, and now I wish I hadn't. What I'm sure was intended as a patriotic message came off as preachy and condescending.
I really feel like I wasted my time and money, and I dislike Artie even more now.
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Good stories.
The stories in the book are good, and they're well told by each of the speakers. My only problem (which is a big one for an audio book) is that it seems like Artie got too lazy to finish doing it... knowing his personality from the Stern show, this is most likely the case. Would have really liked to hear Artie talk about his attempted suicide rather than Bob Levy.. The non-Lange readers do a good enough job, but I'd really have liked the entire book from Artie. Since I'm so familiar with the voices of Gary, Jim, and Bob from the radio I started forgetting I was listening to a story about Artie, and that I was listening to a story about the speaker.
I don't see how having Bababooey, Jim Florentine, and Bob Levy read certain chapters improved the book in any way.
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